Dear sister,

Reciprocal space…that strange uncanny ability of matter to transform itself from real to a Fourier reflection of reality.  This is how I sometimes view the life I live within such close proximity to the Equine. Daily life is confined and astern, with no inclusion of green comforts except the occasional visit to the conservatory. Then there are the encounters with the Equine, both in reality and in a dream state.  These are the saving experiences of my life.  These encounters overshadow the more mundane occurrences and I try to give priority to the effects these occasions evoke in me.  Much as flaws on a microscopic level chose to perform magic when no one is looking, I try and focus on the magic reflection of my existence and not the steel grey reality of daily station life. The recall of the dream encounters with the Equine does not always include all the details, but I try to find meaning and understanding in the memories that are available after awakening so I can use this content to push me through the tedium and depression that threaten to overtake me at times.

Since you are now in close proximity to me, your presence in my dreams has diminished to almost nothing.  Sometimes I recall a dim memory of your infrequent dream visit, but upon awakening the memory is not retrievable.  Only a vague emotional shadow of joy or sadness lingers, screaming out for response.  I am not sure what this means.  I guess because I now have the ability to reach out to you with the anticipation of a timely response, this negates the need for your nightly visits and reassurance from your dream self.  I strongly wish I have both personas available from you, but I prefer the former since it is really you and not a manifestation (refection) of you in my mind.

On the other hand, my Equine encounters have been vivid and when I awaken, I quickly put pen to paper to record these recollections in detail and accuracy. These recordings have provided a fascinating study into the creature itself, but also into my own state of mind.  I can already glimpse the changes in me now that the full effects of the Equine are available.  I am compiling these dreams and musings into a single file every thirty days and will send each of them to you after my analyses of the brain waves during that period are complete.  In parallel I am also keeping a daily journal of mood, health,  mental cognition and nutritional intake to provide supplemental data. It will be beneficial to our research to correlate the state of the unconscious mind to the cognizant mind when it is first introduced to the Equine influence. Also we can perform a comparison of your first year to mine.  This will illuminate the difference between planetary exposure and near proximity, undistorted exposure.

The last part of the puzzle will be the lab study journal I am preparing and the data from the instruments monitoring the creature. Later we can match these with your first years statistics on New London.  This will give us the differences both in time and space of the planetary exposure and station exposure.  We may need to decide if the final rendition needs to spend an extended period on the space station once it is complete.

I look forward to your account of the visit with Nicolaas.  I find myself thinking off and on of the meals you described in your letters when you visited him at this retreat.  Now you get to experience once again the provender he is famous for. I hope it turns out as enjoyable as you remember.  Please write back and tell me all about it.  I will read it with envy as I consume my space station fare.  (no insult to Chef Emilia’s kitchen intended, but she has a limited variety to work with)

I am working on a full narrative of my missing time before my arrival at the Phycoduras.  I neglected to recall how time consuming the scribing of our secret language was when I suggested using this method of communication.   Give me a bit more time before I can share it.  I am sure you want it to be legible.  You know how terrible my handwriting can be.

Love Annalis